OK, friends. Thirty-nine weeks down and one to go. After being pregnant now 160 weeks, or 40 months, or 3.333 years out of my life, I’ve heard a few “interesting” comments about pregnancy along the way. I’d much prefer laughing over crying, however, I am admittedly overly sensitive during pregnancy. I’ve gotten really good at swallowing these too-tender feelings and cracking a joke. But that doesn’t mean when I’m driving away or in the shower I don’t lose it more than I’d like to admit.
Here are a few doosies:
I know I’m big, but let’s just keep those type of comment to ourselves, shall we?
You’re not having twins? ARE YOU SURE?
When I’m 8 months pregnant, don’t even go there. After having several sonograms and hearing one heart beat month after month, I’M SURE there are not two babies in there. Promise.
How far along are you? Oh, bummer. You still have a long ways to go.
I KNOW. Trust me, the count down has been going on for 39 weeks. I don’t care how far along I am — don’t remind me of what I haven’t done.
Can you fit in a booth or do you need a table?
This one was just thrown at me last weekend on our date night. I’m happy to report I fit into a booth just fine (whew!).
I didn’t know they made shorts that big.
Where did you find a shirt that large?
Again, Dad, way to make me feel like a movie star.
Geez, you’re carrying quite a load.
With this 8-lb ball resting on my bladder and sciatic nerve, pressing my lungs and diaphragm, squishing my stomach, and making my varicose veins look like garden hoses — tell me something I don’t know.
When do you pop?
This one always seems to come from the 18-year-old check out gal at the grocery store.
You’re not sick or broken, you’re just pregnant.
I can’t put into words how much I hate this one. I know women have been getting pregnant for eons, but there are days I FEEL SICK. AND BROKEN. It’s just part of the process, I realize, but often I feel upside down and inside out. Just let me lay down for a while, then I’ll perk up.
You’re armpits are sweaty.
I don’t know why, but when my daughter commented on my dinner plate sized sweat marks it just hit a tender spot.
You are eating again?
Ugh, if I could stop I would. But eating is the only thing that makes me feel like I’m not going to fall over. So, get outta my way and give me another bowl of Cheerios.
Are you sure you should be exercising?
YES! It’s the only time I feel like myself. I finally feel great!
I never had to buy maternity clothes. I just wore my jeans lower on my hips and stretchy shirts.
You think I WANT to be wearing this tent? I’m in maternity clothes from the word “go” and am busting out of the XL’s during my final weeks. Elastic waist bands and stretchy panels are my BFF’s.
After the baby, I was back in my jeans within two weeks.
You win, my friend! Wahoo! I’m taking a BYE on this silly competition. Gimme a solid year, sister. I’m in no hurry and neither is this body.
How about you, Fit Mommas. What are some things you’ve heard while pregnant that should go on the “What NOT to Say” list? Comment below!